Category: General

MATCH REPORT: PSCC v SCC 16th May 2015

DRAW of timed game
PSCC scoring 213 for 5 over 38 overs
SCC scoring 100 for 9

Match report by comrade commissar adjutant and captain on the day, Soldya, Dan March.

THE PENN IS NOT MIGHTIER THAN THE LORD (JONTIN)

Ahh Communists – this is the tale of how the Collective fought valiantly that sunny Saturday of 16th May. Into the valley of Amersham rode, strode and err ‘goed’ The Eleven of the SCC – travelling all the way to zone 9 (and beyond) to the land of the Penn Streeters.

Lord Walrus Jontin Black Knight the Third (Son of Stalin) did lose the toss and they elected to bat. A timed game ruled that we should bowl as many as we could/should until 4.30ish and then after tea we should be bowled at until they could stand no more.

Thus the opening bowling partnership of Hodderov and Chipmunski did let rip with some pure communistic deliveries – deserving wickets (but life isn’t always fair eh comrades?) the pair did succeed in restricting their opening partnership of Sutherland and Mitchell to 53 off 12 overs. In fact Chipmunski’s first 8 overs only cost 22 runs – any gulag would be proud of such miserliness. An inspired bowling change by our glorious capitalist leader brought Hooperov to the fore and he duly delivered with a brace of fine wickets – each bowled victim having just been preceded by a dropped catch (lulling the Penns into our leader’s trap) – his 4 overs, 2 for 10 even more deserving of praise as he was nursing an injury. This was accompanied by some excellent fielding from Boringski off Chipmunski’s bowling – picking the ball up beautifully in mid-wicket his pin-point throw to Robski and dithering running from Mitchell meant a fine run-out and suddenly Penn St were reduced to 63 for 3…could this be our day Comrades?

In a word – No. Exton and Martin compiled a steady 50 partnership, although our glorious leader Jontin Stalingrad Jontinovski the Eighth could/should/would have had an LBW or two but their imperialist umpires were unmoved. Then somehow – perhaps inspired by his Captain’s faith in giving him a six over spell – Soldya fashioned a delivery which pitched outside off but spun in to remove all three stumps…errr,well actually just tickling the bails off  (which is how our leader likes it) and thus they were 117-4. Was there hope Comrades? Again the word is ‘No’ – as Adams joined Exton to bludgeon all we could throw at them. After one mighty six the ball was lost for several minutes in the woods which reduced the number of overs they could face – ah the joys of a timed game! This then became Jontin’s new master plan and we duly lost the ball on two, if not three, further occasions. There were some difficult chances dropped in the field with balls flying like bullets (something our Captain is no stranger to) however one fine, wondrous catch was a thing of beauty to behold: Soldya, in the final over, was lofted high, high, ever higher into the air and Chipmunski (in the perfect field position) steadied himself with admirable Left-wing calmness and pouched a corker! Joy unconfined as the pair had put on nearly 100 in 12 overs – ouch! The final score of 213-5 would have been higher had it not been for fine athletic fielding all round with special mention to Sewellski, new blood Analich and Cobramovich’s right buttock. A stiff total to beat but our Captain confided in me that he had no fear.

An excellent match tea, including a rather delightful fruit salad, stiffened our sinews (pleasing our glorious leader) for the fight and our opening comradely partnership of Cobramovich and Hooperov looked majestic and unbeatable in the middle. At 17- 0 off 6 overs the pair were easing in to a long and match winning partnership when…what was this? An appeal for LBW?… the umpire raised his finger and Cobra must return to his Siberian snake charmer’s lair – our hissing comrade suffering double vision over the decision, perhaps caused by his throbbing buttock. Ah but Boringski – fresh from his excellent innings against LMS was sure to steady the ship…but luck was not on his side as Goodie took his second wicket with the ball not bouncing and somehow flicking onto the stumps – dreadful luck. Brandonovski then strode to the wicket fresh from his umpiring duties and returned not long after having failed to trouble the scorer. The SCC were 33-3 off 16, not a million miles behind Penn St at this stage. However their first change bowler Adams (the self-same Adams who plundered 58 from 32 deliveries) ripped the heart – but never the spirit – out of the SCC batting line-up. In his opening spell he dismissed Analich (another LBW), Sewellski ( third highest scorer with 6) and Jontin (his bails ripped off behind his back – damn those Imperialist swine). When Wartack returned to bowl Robski for a big fat zero, poor comrade Hooperov had seen 7 valiant comrades fall. But young Hodderov is made of sterner stuff and the two seemed set fair to bat out the remaining overs. But disaster! Oh ye Communist Gods (if they existed) how could ye do this to us – after 57 scintillating runs Hooperov hit his own stumps with still 6 overs to face. With Soldya nervously walking to the crease it seemed that all hope was gone – a streaky edged 4 through the slips put hearts in mouths but somehow he and the excellent Hodderov negotiated the next 5 overs…the final over and Adams returned to the fray. His second ball a rip snorting yorker and Hodderov had to depart. Step forward Chipmunski – (with Soldya at the non-striker’s end bravely shouting ‘Please don’t run, you take the last 4 balls’) – another rip snorting yorker – blocked brilliantly, and another – blocked, and another – blocked…one ball to come…wayward, down leg side – but the umpire doesn’t signal wide (oh brave leftist umpiring)…and it is A DRAW comrades…a mighty, mighty draw. Fine captaincy, excellent fielding and resolute defence has ensured that the Penn can not write another victory in their scorebook. WELL DONE SCC. Semper soldales, fors et victores.

PSCCvSCC_16May2015_PSCCinnings
PSCCvSCC_16May2015_PSCCinnings
PSCCvSCC_16May2015_SCCinnings
PSCCvSCC_16May2015_SCCinnings

AGM minutes, Tuesday 3rd February 2015

Judge Yuri
Judge Yuri

Comrades!

Behold, scrumptious minutes scrawled and reinterpreted by my good self which report the stunning pantomime of serious intent, which was our AGM. None of you would enjoy it or take any pleasure from it, so please continue to avoid it like the plague so that we may bear the strain of leadership and bleed before your eyes, the tears of burden.

Let the detail commence:

YURI – comrade commissar premier

  • A huge turn-out of five attended:
    • Cobramovich
    • Ilyeva
    • Jontin
    • Vlad
    • Yuri
  • All were welcomed.


ILYEVA –
comrade commissar treasurer

  • Ilyeva presented the statements of account which were accepted. Comrade commissar Jontin noted that in all of his time dealing with sums, figures, balance sheets and accounting forms, he had never seen such a set of figures.
  • CLICK ME FOR ACCOUNTS
  • In regards to the bank, it was agreed that the 20-20 matches had upheld the accounts in the black.
  • We must consider carefully the hosting of matches as they cost us.
  • Membership fees are to go up to £50 from £40 but this includes the charitable donation which is remaining at £20.
  • It was noted that other clubs’ fees are still substantially higher than ours.
  • SCC hosted matches are to be charged at £15 whilst away matches are still £10. Remember that SCC hosted matches are quite rare and always superb!
  • After much discussion, the AGM voted in favour of benefiting only Parkinson’s UK from last year’s available charitable funds. Royal Marsden had already benefited from £1,200.00 and more the previous years. The amount we shall pay from last year’s fees and reserves is to be discussed further and reported back before matches commence this year.
  • More use will be made of the charity donation tins at all matches. No more hiding away.

 

COBRAMOVICH in place of BRANDONOVSKI comrade commissar quartermaster

  • Apologies presented to Yuri from Brandonovski. He was unable to attend due to the illness of the club mascot, Walwynski.
  • It is hoped that the Quartermaster will provide a small report on last season’s kit and equipment.
  • Cobramovich asked us to ensure that logins and passwords are available for Serious Cricket site.
  • In regards to the SCC and Serious Cricket, their range is now improved and all of the SCC should check out this new delight of goodies.

COBRAMOVICH – comrade commissar cultural attache

  • At this point, chips were ordered.
  • In a drive to bring in PAWS as well as their players, Cobramovich suggested that this season we strive to have some Tee Shirts made up which bear the SCC logo, big and proud. Great idea and unanimously supported. Brando and Cobramo to arrange.
  • NEW MEMBERS’ event  to be Russian themed.
    • Vodka tasting
    • Prize event?
    • Aim to make it Friday 1st May 2015.
    • To my memory, Cobramovich will lead the organising.
  • La tour d’Oxford 2015. (Deal with my terrible French, Soldya!) The Stoke Row tour covers two days with a night between which would admirably suit a team dinner. These are hellish events to organise as people need to sleep and eat in the same place. But the idea was mooted. There is apparently a suitable pub. Feelers will be put out.
  • COBRAMOSIZE to be brought back. More publicity and an attendance drive for this worthwhile pre-season body and soul work out. Can be adjoined to a nets session.
  • CAPTAINS’ REPORTS
    • Cobramovich was pleased with the games at the beginning and the end of the season, LMS and Xiles. Very kind words in regards to Yuri at LMS. Quite splendidly impressed by the comrades’ performance in Brighton for the Xiles victory. Great depth and ability exhibited. Dagleyev shone! And Vlad mentioned that even the birds stopped singing during the excitement at the close of play.
    • Jontin Stoke Row. Great victory, well deserved and only mired by one of our own players and a pity.  Quote from captain Jontin, “If you’re in, stay in!” – who can argue with that. He held a firm hand on the match and is remorseless – splendid captaincy, Jontin. Lindfield – Another splendid victory. A match of three halves.  Jontin is keen on batting first – a brief rustle of consternation – but so we did. Yuri brought back in to bowl fora second time after a first stint under-performing. Made a difference – Jontin providing a second chance. Team spirit talk really helped save us. Favourite quote of the match was between Sewelski and Jontin, the latter saying it was time to get back into the match, Sewelski returning, “No Jont’s, let’s go and win it!”. Brava!
    • Yuri could remember little of the matches he captained due to the intense excitement. However, de did recall a general note which was how superb Hodderoff was as an opening bat. Then we discussed some general captaining points:
      • When both bats realise the need for the weaker to sacrifice themselves, that event must be planned for and signalled clearly by the captain… And acted upon.
      • Secret communications required when in bat and VC to take over when captain is batting.
      • Captaincy training.
    • NEW captains: Ilyeva and Vlad (Boringski) elected to captain a match this coming season and those from last year to be accommodated also. These can be either 20-20 or 40 over. Soldya required to captain Keble match.
    • We must develop a Man of the Match system.
  • YURI – AOB
    • Royal Marsden, David Adams’ appeal challenge.
      Significant debate was made over this annual fixture due to its cost and the fact that we nearly always lose out financially. The decision was to drop it unless we could get a suitable sponsor to reduce the costs for each player below £100. So who could sponsor us? Possibly Union? Maybe Finn if there was an option to pitch for Royal Marsden work obligation. To investigate.
    • A winner’s meal (was it for Comrades’ comrade winner?) was considered at 10 Greek Street. good idea, but who is the winner and of what? Please remind me.
    • VLAD: Let us have another field practice session as we did several seasons ago. This proved VERY popular and was previously played near Hampstead. LINK HERE to previous session. Let’s organise this, Yankheroff, fancy a planning session?
      Vlad also suggested another fixture, the details of which have gone to Yankheroff.
    • Separate call out for PAWS (Partner, wives and singles) to build a boundary side community and ensure support for all, players and mothers alike! Free T-Shirts!!!

 

20/20 Beer
Good Beer
  • FIXTURES AND DATES – courtesy of hard work by Yankheroff, 20-20 support by Cobramovich and Brandonovski.
    • YANKHEROFF:
      An exciting summer of cricket lies ahead, comrades, with capitalist opposition both old and new. Traditional fixtures such as VCC, Xiles, Chesham, Linfield and Penn St are all in place, alongside a return to Stoke Row (with potential for a weekend mini-tour) and the summer is book-ended with home and away fixtures against our friends LMS. We also have new fixtures against Believers CC (thanks Soldya) and another attempt with Keble College in Oxford, which fell foul of the capitalist weather last June.
      I do need some help securing grounds for the VCC match in June and the Xiles match in July (I have made repeated enquiries with St James & Montefiore, to no avail. Maybe Chipmunkski can have a word?) Can I leave this with you lot please, as any day now I will be going off grid!

 

  • APRIL

  • Sunday 26th – POSSIBLE Hildenborough CC v SCC (LINK TO HCC)
  • MAY

  • Friday 1st May – NEW MEMBERS’ DRINKS
  • Sunday 10th – LMS CC v SCC @ Southgate
  • Friday 15th – F4 20/20 – Round 1 – Pitch 1:  VCC v SCC
  • Saturday 16th – Penn St CC v SCC @ Penn St
  • Wednesday 20th – possible David Adam’s appeal tournament in Teddington: Link
  • Friday 29th – F4 20/20 – Round 2 – Pitch 1:  SCC v Tavs
  • JUNE

  • Saturday 6th June – Keble College 2nd XI v SCC @ Keble Sports Ground, Oxford
  • Sunday June 21st – SCC v VCC @ GROUND NEEDED PLEASE
  • JULY

  • Saturday July 4th – TBC v SCC @ TBC (potential tour match in Stoke Row area, LINK: NETTLEBED? )
  • Sunday July 5th – Stoke Row CC v SCC @ Stoke Row
  • Sunday July 19th – Xiles CC v SCC @ St James’ & Montefiore
  • Friday 24th – F4 20/20 – Finals – Pitch 1:  LMS v SCC  / Awards Presentation
  • Friday 31st – SCC v BOLCC 20/20 annual
  • AUGUST

  • Friday 7th – Linfield CC v SCC @ Linfield
  • Sunday 16th – Believers CC v SCC @ Battersea Park
  • Sunday 30th – Chesham Bois CC v SCC @ Chesham Bois

    SEPTEMBER

  • Sunday 20th Sept – SCC v LMS CC @ Chiswick Park

 

CHANGES AND AMMENDMENTS

Any attendees or contributors to the AGM who remember things differently or would like to note changes or omissions to these minutes, please email me and I shall make suitable corrections.

Many thanks for your works and interest, comrades all.

Do Svidaniya!

Awards Night, 2014 season

Comrades!

comrade commissar Yankheroff 2014 Comrades' comrade
comrade commissar Yankheroff
2014 Comrades’ comrade

One million apologies for the terribly late post of this blog. I shall publicly flog myself with a damp sardine. But nothing will stop me from admiring the splendid comrades who attended our end of season awards night at The Union Club on 12th November 2014.

Firstly, let us commence with our most deserving of award winners, winner of the comrades’ comrade award 2014 went to Yankheroff, aka John Hirst. Receiving a significant voting majority in the secret poll, Yankheroff rightly took home the extremely heavy trophy! His exploits on the field and especially behind, meant that he is a worthy winner. The extensive fixture list and negotiation required was down to him and he undertook this task manfully. Congratulations.

Other winners were:

 

 

Captaincy Merits:

  • Brandonovski (Peter Brandon)
  • Cobramovich (Tim Graham)
  • Jontin (Jon Savitt)
  • Marx (Mark Blackledge)
  • Yankheroff (John Hirst)
  • Yuri (Philip Richardson)

Most Improved:

  • Chipmunkski (Tim Richardson)

Most Catches: Joint winners

  • Cobramovich (Tim Graham)
  • Soldya (Dan March)

Most Wicket Catches:

  • Robski (Rob Dixon)

Most Wickets Bowled: 11

  • Yuri (Philip Richardson)

Most Runs Scored: 225

  • Dagleyev (Neil Dagley)

We in the commissariat and all comrades, strong in heart and true in spirit, salute you all, comrades! Great work and may you act as inspiration for all present and future comrades to fight, drink and play harder.

Semper Sodales, Fors et Victores!