Tag: Andrew Sewell

MATCH REPORT STOKE ROW CC v SCC 6th July 2014

Stoke Row CC
Stoke Row CC

SCC won by 33 Runs with 148 all out

SRCC at 115 runs all out
40 over match timed match

Comrades!

VICTORY AT LAST  

Stoke Row CC is a brand new fixture and came out of our great game at Stonor a couple of years ago. It’s a very pretty village and the ground is neatly filed at the top of the high street and conveniently close to a very nice pub – our kind of ground! Surrounded by trees and beneath a warm sky of dark, flat clouds and sunshine, the weather behaved itself and we got under way.

Skipper_thinking
Skipper Jontin

Under the fine skipperage of comrade commissar Jontin, we set to the game. It’s true that comrade commissar Jontin is a firm hand upon the tiller, it’s true that he is stiff of voice and firm in approach, but there is no doubt that he is the right man to be stiff and firm once taken in hand.

Taking guard together was opener Marx-B and Yankheroff. The former was to settle in for a good long stretch, but sadly not Yankheroff. Caught May off Roberts. Marx was in true form and not off anywhere in a hurry.

Up to the crease followed Busteroff adding 9 to the score and then Conbramovich. This fine gentleman of cricket was to be seen scampering back and forth with Marx, each passing each other in a graceful manner. However after adding 13 he was taken by A.Roberts.

Twizzle showed great flash and panache and knocked up a commendable 32. This was a great addition and put a slight air of unrest amongst the oppo. He was eventually LBW to Kimber, but this knock put us up on the map.

Another knock of note is 17 scored by Soldya. Great ball placement and a vigorous demeanor. So when finally we were all NINE out for 148, I feel we had a made a fairly good bash.

Doleful Soldya
Soldya preparing for his knock

And now for tea – THE VICTORIA SPONGE was gorgeous!

Bowling opened with Yankheroff and myself, Yuri. It took a while to work ourselves up into a stew, but we kept good economy and kept their run rate down. And then the wood began to tumble. Yankheroff was outstanding and  bowled two, LBW another caught another later on!

I obliged with a niggley wicket and my new and amusing skippy run-up. Caused souly by my lack of effort in measuring out my run! But talking of run-ups, Soldya provided just what the atmosphere required – a breath taking run up of 100 yards! That had everyone tittering and remembering the point of an amateur Sunday XI game – fun.

Say what
He called me a what?

Hats off to Twizzle – Skipper advised him to lower his pace below 80mph and he took it down to 79.8 – which was generous!! He slammed into the wickets of May, Roberts and Kimber and those balls that didn’t hit the stumps, were later found in Middlesex.

Chipmonkski was wicky for the majority of the match and made great work with his hands and I must also commend skipper Jontin for helping scoring whilst i made my brief journey to the crease.

We got them all out on the 30th over leaving them on 115.

Comrades, from the bottom of my heart and on behalf of us all who form the SCC, I say congratulations and thank you. May we preserve forever the memory of this game in our hearts for it showed us that victory is possible for us, that comradery is a key element to our play and that if we lose sight of FUN in our team, we lose the point in playing at all.

SEMPER SODALES, FORS ET VICTORES

Yuri

SCC_innings_V_StokeRow2014
SCC_innings_V_StokeRow 2014
SRCC innings 2014 Stoke row
SRCC innings 2014 Stoke row

 

 

MATCH REPORT – Grace Cup Tournament

Chipmunkski
Chipmunkski

All games out of 4 lost.
Last place of 4

Once more we grace the fields of Roehampton. Fields which are as flat as a billiard table, wickets as tended as a maidens vizog. The bacon baps and coffee were laid for us to devour and the reception was warm. Our team this year was new blood, Hodderofski, Yuri, Sewelski, Chipmunkski, Cobramovich, Soldya and of course, Yankheroff! What a line up. The opposition against us were: Deutsche Bank, Slaughter and May, Osborne Clarke and Willis.

What follows now is some random stats. The reason is I couldn’t photograph all of the score sheets for the matches and so I am relying on fond memories of the day by the players. Self verification required, comrades!

 

20140521_192242
Beer?

From Soldyai got one wicket – caught T.Richardson. Runs – am trying to remember…didn’t get any 4s or 6s – got about 6 runs in the last game and only 1 or 2 in the others I think – maybe 12 runs in total???

20140521_192850
Booby Duck

From Cobramovich: I only batted in the 2 matches you don’t have. As I walked in after succumbing, the scorers announced me as scoring 13 in the first of these, and 17 in the final one. (2 fours in the later innings). I also got a catch in the first match off Hodderov’s bowling, but no wickets bowling.

From Hodderoffski: 1st Match – 12 runs (not out), 2nd Match – 4 runs (run out), 1 wicket (caught, Cobramovich), 3rd Match – DNB, 1 wicket (bowled), 4th Match – 1 run,  1 wicket (caught and bowled) – 1×6=scored

So comrades, please pay it some heed next season as it truly is good fun and we are able to do a lot of good work for a good cause. Thank you!

David Adams Leukaemia Appeal Fund

TheirInningsInningsDeutscheBank2014
Our Innings Deutsche Bank 2014
OurInningsDeutscheBank2014
Our Innings Deutsche Bank 2014
OurInningsSlaughterMay2014
Our Innings Slaughter May 2014
TheirInningsSlaughterMay2014
Their Innings Slaughter May 2014

Match Report: Badlesmere XI CC v SCC Saturday 1st June 2013

40 over game, retire at 100 n/o
Badlesmere XI win by 99 runs; 253 for 3
SCC 154 all out

Belmont House Cricket Ground
Belmont House Cricket Ground

SPECIAL REPORT FROM COMRADE COMMISSAR COBRAMOVICH!
Comrade Commissar Ileyva Lunchourov looked disconsolately from the rain-splattered window of his Zil limousine as it passed Belmont House. These sickening capitalists and their decadent displays of faded, historic, exploitative wealth! This accurse-sed exile!! How he longed once again for the honest grit of the Donbass coalfield and the long-lost, brotherly self-respect afforded him by the heroic miners of the glorious cause.

In the following convoy of black cars, Altmananov’s eyes also narrowed with politico-philosophical distrust as he passed the fascists’ mansion, then Brandonovski’s, and so on, until all 11 of the Soviet cavalcade had traversed the centre of the former great rural estate, on the last lap to the battlefield. Only Jontin, himself rescued by the Red forces from his defiantly aristocratic parents, as a mere toddler during the Great Uprising, seemed to betray a furtive glimpse of distant longing in his dark eyes, as he fleetingly surveyed the stone monolith. His balding, burly State driver surely noticed, but as always remained silent…

An hour later, Supreme Leader ‘Tzar’ (not in the pre-1917 sense you understand, but perhaps we remain essentially a peasant people, at once ever seeking, loving and fearing a Supreme Leader?) Yuri Pedeez, having inserted the Kentish opposition, the Collective were staring into a cricketing abyss: An unreconstructed Badlesmere Occasionals opening batsman – De Moubray, surely an unapologetic exploiter of the masses – was nearing his half-century, clubbing the hissing Cobramovich to the leg-side boundary at will. Hirstheryankov, Samovar, Sewellski and new convert Mullertov Cocktail also all battled hard with their crimson balls to remove this Western ogre; but none could – and the vile Enemy Of The People only retreated once he had passed his debut 100.

YuriCobraEarScratching
I would rather pick my ear than score any more!

In fact, despite some excellent fielding on the big stately home pitch, including Ileyva and Altmananov both bravely taking nasty knocks for the team, we were nevertheless only able to dispatch 3 other capitalists to the Gulag. The highlight for this humble Pravda propagandist being Cosmonaut Sewellski’s wicket: The Blakes 7 oligarch’s rangy bowling quickly eliciting a fine catch at short extra cover from (the clearly surprised) Yuri.

At least we remained cosy in the drizzle-threatening gloom, thanks – courtesy Quartermaster Brandonovski – to our freshly delivered new club sweaters, emanating pungent wafts of Ural Mountain sheep wool. The aroma drifted dreamily over the North Downs and soulfully compounded our deep desire for a return to the Motherland. Meanwhile, by tea a brutal target of 253 had been set us Russians by the Imperialists.

Orthodox blessings then upon the strawberry meringues served, such a guilty bourgeois pleasure for this simple son of the black Ukrainian soil. I justified my corrupted treachery by observing that at least they were partly Red in colour.

I am that bored
I am that bored

With a run-rate in excess of 6 an over required for victory, could perhaps our openers, the in-form Arctic Monster of frozen Arkangel, Jontin – fresh from his Collective record-topping individual score of 77 at Penn Street – and big-hitting ‘keeper Robski, build a platform quickly enough to topple the decadents? Nyet! Robski, then Sewellski, both fell to the ghastly Shirley. Russians, felled for year zeros by a man with a woman’s name. Readers, reflect for a moment on the shame in zat zentence…

Mullertov entered, rather curiously swishing his hips while holding his bat parallel with both hands, possibly in a deranged effort to attract ‘Shirley’ with a courtship dance. Or was it a warm up? Western corruption after all is insidious, and we must always be on our guard against it.

Dear Mum, can I come home now?
Dear Mum, can I come home now?

Spaseba though, our number 4 soon got down to honest work, over a full 97 minutes crafting a Caspian Sea-size 3rd wicket partnership of 105 with Jontin, before finally falling on his sickle in the 24th over for a fine 41. Jontin lasted another half-hour, ratcheting up the score to a near respectable 128-5, at which point he was roostered by Cockerel. (Party-approved word play at an idiotic enemy’s expense, meerkats.) 9 fours, on a tricky wicket and sticky outfield, went towards Jontin’s heroic 72: Another consecutive huge score for the Walrus of the Tundra! Surely the Order of Lenin awaits him at the Union Club in November.

From the remaining batsmen only Samovar, his yogic mysticism tolerated by our gloriously godless regime, could reach double figures; but, facing tidy Badlesmere bowling throughout, it was still encouraging for the future to see The Collective fall just one ball short of batting out the entire allocated 40 overs, the ever-improving Lunchourov cruelly being given LBW on the 5th ball of the final over.

So, 154 all out – a defeat by 99 runs, and surely we had the last grim laugh: The depraved Westerners could not manage to beat us by a hundred. A moral victory for Communist Cricket, Comrades!

Many thanks to all of you comrades and all at Badlesmere. Thank you cmr cms Cobramovich for a startling, incisive, accurate and spine tingling match report, too! – Yuri

 

THEIR iPAD PDFSCORECARD IS HERE….hmmmm!!!

Badlesmere v SCC june 2013 - us
Badlesmere v SCC june 2013 – us