Tag: Vladimir Boringski

Match Report : SCC v XilesCC Sunday 4th August 2013

40 overs, 8 overs/bowler, timed game.
XilesCC win by 117 runs with 9 balls to go.
Xiles 257 for 3 – SCC 140 for 9

Captains in the sun
Captains in the sun

The run down to my home county of Sussex to play cricket, is for me one of the finest things I could do with a morning. Vladimir Boringski kept me company and between us we plotted the overthrow of the imperialist Brighton Xiles XI and their devilish plan for the conquest of North Brighton, or London as we call it.

The sun was with us and baked the tin of my new Ford S-Max like a Sherman tank in the desert of Africa. This was the indeed the first day of a tour of duty in Sussex, Brighton Xiles and then on to Lindfield. We felt like the devilish rats of the 8th army – soiled, dirty, hot and sweaty and ready for some blood.

St James’ and Montefiore ground is between Hassocks and Ditchling and sits amiably below the South Downs. Quite superb. The pavilion is a great palace of slatted timber that welcomes and seduces the teams into a suitably competitive spirit and when Cobramovich and the Xiles’ Hooper walked back from a swift toss on the pitch, we were all set to play.

We took to the field first. A great team with some superb additions to help us out and both of whom I must credit thoroughly for their help: Geoff and Neal Freeman, aka The Freemanoffs. Having been at school with Neal and also having worked with Geoff (barely a few years ago!) I knew the dynasty and of their close family connection to Tich Freeman. Great things are due, thank you comrades.

Opening the bowling, The Richardson Brothers: Myself (Yuri) and Chimpmunkski. Xiles’ Captain David Hooper and ‘Will’ facing. Quite a good and relaxed opening was had and they were happy clattering balls away though not rapidly at first. But at 51 I got Capt’ Hooper LBW and with not an ounce of disappointment or sadness he strolled from the pitch, full of joy having scored a very admirable 31.

Not a lot developed for a while but when Chipmunkski and I finished our spells, he was at 28 off 7 with a maiden to boot and I at 34 with my wicket – not awful. then streaking into the sun and spitting 33 caliber balls turned our replacements Sewelski and Vlad the Impaler, Boringski. We must credit the former with a sterling performance and improvement. With every passing ball and over his line and length improved and we began to see the spin from his youth. Facing him our finest Vlad Boringski, drilling in great style.

However, the runs were building as David M had replaced the Hooper man, and it wasn’t until the 30th over and a score of 205 that Will was stumped for 58 off our most excellent guest, Geoff Freemanoff. The heat of the day was obviously not helping us and David M got up to 89 before an LBW from God Knows Who. 28 and 23 from Tom and Luke C. Neal Freemanoff gave a splendid rendition of an over and Brandonovski obliged us with a couple and hopefully more to come. But 40 0vers were up and 257 was scored for 3.

St James Montefiore Ground
St James Montefiore Ground

PAWS stands for Partners, Wives and Singles. Deal with it. Without them we would all be so much less of a team, so much less as individuals and bereft of certain key aspects of the game. One of which would have been tea. Brandonovski and Ilyeva had brilliantly planned the arrival of the nosh and with the help of the PAWS it was laid out like the feast of the ancients (I have no idea what I am writing about). We fell upon it and much like the Demolition of Rasputeles’ castle of Aluminium Foil, we were fed and ready for our innings (Please help me).

Cobramovich and Robski walked out into the late afternoon sun. Each eager and astute. A 35 minute partnership followed until Robski was caught off Tulley for 17. Three boundary 4s though and some lovely dotting. Cobramovich welcomed cmr. cms. Treasurer Ilyeva in until he was bowled Bradmore for 1. But his body has been clattered this season and we know he will be fighting fit for 2014.

Brandonovski now touched gloves with Cobramovich and did some fine Dorothy work until being taken by Tulley again. But any dotting over ten is worth praise. Vladimir Boringski is now in bat. Gosh, what a figure he cuts out there. I feel an aching sense of pride to see such a sterling posture and presence in the field. Cobramovich was obviously similarly impressed as he was shortly after caught off Bradmore after having provided the SCC with an admirable 21.

Then we gave Vlad some changing scenery at the other end for a while, Nealoff was there but a brief while – but thank you! Then Sewelski. Special note here I think as he banged away two fours before being taken Hales for 8. Then Chipmunkski and myself for 2 and 11 respectively and then to Geoff Freemanoff. Another fine figure occupying the crease and so splendidly so. Something in his pace and capability brought the Xiles into a sticky clamor of fear and silence. 15 runs scored and a couple of boundary fours – Thank you Geoff! Appreciated.

But all good things come to an end and so did we, 140 scored. This fixture and pitch is without doubt a keeper. Well done all around comrades, thank you to our captain Cobramovich and congratulations to the Brighton Xiles under David Hooper’s direction. We shall be back at St James’ Montefiore next year for sure.

Semper Sodales, fors et Victores!

SCC v Xiles XCC innings 2013
SCC v Xiles XCC innings 2013

SCC v Xiles SCC innings 2013
SCC v Xiles SCC innings 2013

Match Report: Stonor CC v SCC 15th September 2012

Lenin in Stonor

Stonor CC win by 7 wickets scoring 219
SCC all out for 95
Timed match

Comrades, it is almost unbelievable that our last match of the season has been played. I am so upset, I haven’t yet even opened my kit bag to clean my whites. However, Mrs. Yuri will no doubt soon be bend my ear to do so. Still, as the season has to end, it could not have ended with a more beautiful, exciting and friendly fixture as this. Stonor CC came as manner from a communist heaven (Minsk?) to replace the dissolved fixture with the NFTS. It will be back next year, but so will Stonor, I hope! Thanks to The Fixture List for tipping me the nod,  cocking me a wink or wibbling me wobble.

Strolling out into the Valley of the living, gazed down on by Red Kites and Dear from the valley’s soft, encompassing hills, one was filled with a desire to play smashing cricket and be jolly hearted and hopeful. Cobramovich captained and won the toss and put the oppo into bat, we were off.

Collings and Powell strolled purposefully out into their field of battle, the SCC gathering themselves to play. The sun was bright and hot and the bowling opened with myself and Antonov. I had bowled two balls to dot, then on my third, Collings made a playful swoosh and edged the ball high and into the grateful and sticky hands of our comrade, Andropov Sewelski. An amazing start. I felt quite bad, being so familiar to the batsman’s situation myself, but Andropov and I will bathe in the wicket, thank you very much!

Replacing Collings was Left hander, Nicholson. Reviewing the scorecard I realise that I almost had exclusive use of Nicholson with few other bowlers getting a go at him. Although he had much more use of me than him. Antonov held down Powell quite well on the other side but it took until an unfortunate 49 for Antonov to get a snick and provide Robski with a great double catch at the wicket. A very valuable bat to take.

Deanov delivers

Antonov had 6 overs for 32 runs and a wicket, nice and economic compared to my 8 for 48 and 1. Much improved results from Antonov mark well for next season whereas my plans for round-the-wicket slip catching may go back on hold. KanKan and Chipmonkski were soon bowling. The former once again coming in like a Steam Roller and the Chipmonkski with his punishing demi-loft, lengthy nibble-off-the bails bowl. Though neither Nicholson or Mayo fell, KanKan had 24 off 6 overs and Chipmonkski, 31 from his first 4 over spell.

Jontin now presented his sterling, communist self at the crease and on his second over, suckered the unsuspecting, though already comfortable at 64 Powell into pitching the ball hard and high on the offside towards the pavilion. What followed, comrades, was a cross between a balletic pirouette and side step, an elegant presentation of both arms above the head and a scooping up of the ball in both hands by Vladimir Boringski (aka Charlie). He took a tumble but came up ball in hand. Beautiful.

Aged Dad

Mayo retired hurt at 50 leaving Hunt and young S.Kimber to face Deanov and Chipmonkski on a second spell. Hunt achieved 30 and the young blood, 2 – but his first proper runs we are told, so collective hats off to him, comrades! Deanov’s 4 overs cost 28 and Jontin’s 6 for 45 and 1 wicket, don’t forget. Chipmonkski’s second spell of 2 overs for 2.

I find fielding first not to my liking, comrades. I was quite bushed and the thought of settling down to the scorecard and dotting up our batting was a relief. Something that we must improve at in capability. It helps your Maths and makes you a better cricketer, comrades. It would also mean you can avoid umpiring! If you avoid both umpiring and scoring then the polit bureau will be taking a close look at selection time.

Deanov and Vladimir Boringski opened for us. Agar and Denton bowling. Agar had three maidens in 7 overs and cost only 13 runs – so nice and tidy. It did mean that Deanov had to play tight and build up to his normal prowess. Vlad too was keeping it tidy but Denton had other ideas and on his 2nd over got Vlad LBW for 0. This brought Robski in.

Denton again took our comrade Robski and this time a wicket. At this point we were 7 for 3. Oh dear. Familiarity breeds contempt and this situation is utterly contemptuous. What we needed was steady dotting and Captain Cobramovich stepped up and in. There was peace and calming vibes. no more wickets now for forty five minutes and the score could slowly rise. Deanov beginning to scent blood and bone. A blade flashing for collective might. Cobramovich steeling his nerve.

“Another bat, premier?”

Denton and Agar had their spells and swapped out with Kimber and and Griffiths. Then Kimber jnr. and Collings. Now Deanov was off on a batting mission and we were up to 58. Captain Cobramovich was stumped off Griffiths slinking snake like back to the crease for 5. His return to the steps brought a sunken expression of “I know not to do that” but we were not down hearted. Brandonovski would keep Deanov company, and did so with similar style and grace as our captain. Dotting away like a pro.

Young Sam Kimber took his first grown up wicket (that is to say, a wicket of a grown-up not a fully developed set of stumps) off Deanov just after his 50. Brining in Samovar. Now both Kimber’s were bowling but it was young Kimber again who snaffled Brandonovski by enabling a catch in the field after he had dotted 27 balls, so well done. Poor Andropov very rapidly fell to young Kimber too, caught and bowled.

Disarray in the ranks! Samovar out for 13 to Sam’s father, Antonov in and out in five minutes being bowled Collings. Jontin was now keeping Chipmonksi company and he made a fine communist, if somewhat aristocratically compromised dot of it. Chipmonkski was bowled Denton and so in I popped as tail end Charlie. I padded one ball and then let Jontin face. But we we weren’t there for too much longer as Denton bowled Jontin next over. We were all out for 95. Another SCC batting experience with high points and many, many low points.

Brothers in scoring.
Especially fond of my box on the table

High points with the bat are Deanov’s 50 then some stoical “staying in” and slowing the rot by captain Cobramovich and Jontin. But joining these usual suspects were two splendid additions to the “I can stay in the crease” gang, Brandonovski and Chipmonkski. Well done comrades, sometimes for these timed games, staying in is worth a hell of a lot.

comrade Vladimir Boringski

A very great day in the delightful Stonor Park and great weather too. Great thanks to all at Stonor for their hospitality and art work in the changing rooms(!).  Well done to young Sam Kimber for playing so well and to our splendid support from young Owen Sewelski stepping in early on to cover some late players. Boooh to the traffic in Henley!

…But a big thanks to all of us comrades for making this final match and the whole season so enjoyable and mutually splendid. A finer bunch of cricketing, communistic styled, soho based, media professionals and dependants you will not meet. Unless you do of course. In which case… ATTACK!

Your very devoted comrade commissar Premier, Yuri.


As ever, the scorecards are below!

spcc-v-scc-15-sep-2012-usStonor CC innings spcc-v-scc-15-sep-2012-themSCC innings